This article is the first article of a two-part series
The second part is entitled “Sex: the best proof for God’s existence”
We all know instinctively that sex has a particular purpose or design. Even if we don’t know exactly what that design is we can recognize when something about a particular sex act or result doesn’t seem right. At this point we are not trying to show the purpose of sex. We are only trying to demonstrate that if we can recognize that something like rape is a misuse of our sexuality then there must be a proper use. If we say that rape is a wrong way to use one’s sexuality then, in effect, we are affirming that there exists a right way to use one’s sexuality. We won’t go into the philosophy of what makes an act like rape, or incest, wrong. We will only discuss the damage it causes and why I think it can lead a person to Atheism.
Over the years I’ve discussed Christianity with atheists and agnostics of different types. One thing that I have found common among many of them is an inability to relate to popular methods of Christian evangelization. The greatest example is that many of the people I have spoken to come from a broken family. Those persons don’t see the Christian message that God is our Father as something that is appealing. That’s because the word “father” may trigger feelings of anger, hatred, or bitterness. A person may have grown up without a father because their father left their mother when he found out she was pregnant or became unfaithful later in marriage and decided to leave his wife and children for another woman. Telling a person with this kind of experience that “God is your father” can sound to them more like you are saying “God is the guy that is going to leave you and your mother with a hole in your heart”. If I had that sort of experience I might respond with “No thanks, keep your religion”.
If a person doesn’t know what it is like to have a loving father because that father has been absent, unloving, or abusive, then that person is likely to project their idea of father onto God who is Father. Similarly, that person will likely project their feelings of their earthly father on to God the Father. I know that if I didn’t know my father, or if he was never really around or involved in my life, I would wonder things like “Where is he? Why is he never around? Why is it that I never get to see him or talk to him? Does he not care about me?”
When God is presented to me as a loving Father, the perfect Father, I might then wonder “Where is he? Why does he never seem to be around when things are bad – when I need him the most? Why can’t I see him or hear him?” I remember once I was explaining this theory to someone while driving. I didn’t see what sort of reaction he was having to anything that I said. However, after I finished, the first thing he said was “You just described me”. He was able to relate to what I was saying because he knew the pain of not having a father around. For a person in the position I have been describing it is reasonable that they should then ask these questions about God. I won’t try to answer them in this article (but I certainly will in future articles) but I believe these are important questions to not only ask but also seek the answers to. They are honest questions that come from the heart. God understands this and, I believe, wants us to ask, and seek answers, to those questions that pain us.
I realize that not every person who comes from a broken family becomes an atheist. It’s not a guaranteed result. My point is that it can cause a crisis of faith that fractures the image we have of God which can then lead to atheism.
The theory is that our sexuality is meant to image the nature of God who is family (see What is the Theology of the Body or read Sex: The best proof for God’s existence after finishing this article). So when we image that love of God properly with our sexuality then we become something of a portrait, a painting, of God to the world.
In other words sex in its pure form speaks a truth to the world: “God exists, He is real and He is Love”. This is evident in a family that sacrifices out of love for each other: the man lays down his life for his bride and the two lay down their lives for their child/children. When we see a family who truly and unselfishly love one another something resonates in our hearts. Something tells us that this is what life is all about. This is what real love is. This sort of love gives us hope and we love to see this sort of love in action. Hence the countless movies that are centered on a love story or a man who sacrifices his self out of love for his woman or his people. Movies like Braveheart, Titanic (where Jack dies saving Rose), and pretty much every other powerful, and lasting, love story share the same theme of self sacrificial love. This sort of love inspires us and gives us hope.
On the other hand sex in its forms of perversion, or lust, speaks a lie to the world: “There is no God. God is not love; he is a slave master and a dictator”. This is evident when we see a man who controls his wife and children through fear and abuse, when a person is raped and murdered for the sake of a climax, and when innocent little children are sexually abused, manipulated, and exploited. This sort of lust clashes with us at our deepest levels. This sort of lust goes against everything we know to be true, good, and beautiful. These sexual perversions cause us to lose faith and hope, not only in humanity but in a God who could allow such things to take place.
Many conclude that such a “loving” God could not exist, thus, atheism.
It seems to be that the popularity of atheism has risen very quickly since the advent of the sexual revolution. The sexual revolution’s message was “Have sex with who you want, whenever you want, for whatever reason you want”. I interpret that to mean “Forget the rules of sex defined by the ancient old Church. You define sex for yourself”.
Nearly five decades later the results of the sexual revolution have brought a near 53% divorce rate, hundreds of new STD’s with millions of new infections every year, and high numbers of broken families and fatherless homes. The corruption of the family fractures the portrait, or image, of God that we are meant to image with our bodies. Therefore, a divorce rate that has been over 50% for nearly twenty years means that more than half of the U.S. population for the last twenty years have been witnessing a fractured image of marriage and therefore a fractured image of God. This is the statistic of only the U.S. population and does not encompass the broken families in the U.S. where the parents of a child never marry.
If sex in its proper form is meant to reveal to us the nature of God then God is being hidden from more than half of U.S. families.
It’s no wonder that the number of atheists has grown so quickly over the past few decades and is continuing to grow. There are many issues that have been mentioned that are not resolved in this article. It was not meant to tackle the issue of atheism in its entirety. This article was meant only to establish that it is reasonable to believe that sexual perversion can lead to atheism. However, I believe that if sexual perversion can lead one to atheism then authentic sexuality can lead one back to God.
The good news is that if it is true that broken families can portray a fractured image of God which then can lead to atheism then meditating on the true image of sexual love can help reveal God to us. In other words, for those who struggle with belief in God – I believe meditating on the Church’s teaching on sexuality is the best remedy.
To see what I mean, read the second article of this series.
Sex: the best proof for God’s existence
Are you having problems in your marriage? If you are considering divorce or know someone considering divorce, contact Greg and Julie at the Alexander House.
TheAlexanderHouse.org