Weekly Meditations

How do you answer the question, “What does it mean to have faith?”

I want to address a special privilege that all girls have – I call it the ability to “set her price”.

Now before I get into the topic I want to talk about why guys need to hear this. This isn’t really an exciting topic for most dudes. I understand that. However, we need to be aware of our tendencies, our struggles, as well as what girls struggle with.

What makes a great cyber security analyst or crime investigator is their ability to understand the criminal. Cyber security operators study criminal hacking techniques and methods and learn how crackers break into computer networks so that they can protect their network from those attacks. Criminal investigators get inside the mind of a criminal in order to find who committed the crime. If you don’t understand who it is that you are pursuing you will have a hard time catching them. Therefore, guys, you need to spend some time getting inside the mind of a woman.

Now ladies, I’m going to do you a huge favor. I’m going to let you inside the mind of men. It’s just as important, maybe more, that you understand how guys think and make decisions. Let’s talk about a scenario. My wife and I are at a restaurant and we just finished eating. The waiter comes up to us and says “would you like any desert?” We take a look at the menu and there are only two choices for desert: a small brownie and a huge ice cream Sunday smothered in brownie chunks and topped with fudge. Now, I don’t really care for chocolate all that much. I like it. I’ll eat it. But I don’t really like it enough to go buy it most of the time. My bride, Dianne, loves chocolate. She’d consider selling one of her kids for a Sunday smothered in brownie. So, I look at the prices and both items are 50 cents. What do you think I tell the waiter? “We’ll take two fudge brownie smothered Sunday’s… and an extra one to go, please.”

I don’t even like chocolate that much but, geez, 50 cents? Why not? Let’s alter that scenario a little bit. Say I take a look at the prices and the brownie is 50 cents and the Sunday is 5 dollars… “Waiter, we’ll just take one brownie to share. In fact… can you cut it in half and charge us 25 cents?” Now, on the way home from the restaurant I might ask Dianne if we can stop at Best Buy to look at a new $3000 TV I want to buy. Ladies, are you following me? Guys will take something they don’t really care for if it’s cheap. If it’s costly – they will only pay for things that they really care about.

Ladies, you set your own value. If you set it low then you will attract the guys who are looking for someone cheap. If you set your value extremely high then you will find the only guy willing to pay what you are truly worth. Our challenge to people is to follow our lead and start saving your next kiss for marriage. This is a great way to reveal a person’s true intentions at the very beginning. I know it’s tough to think about.

What if I tell the guy I am saving my next kiss for marriage and he never calls me again? That could happen, but is that the kind of guy you want to marry (or even date)? From the very beginning this guy has told you that he’s not interested in getting to know you. He’s only interested in your body if he’s not willing to try and understand why you have such a high price tag. I know it’s hard but you make it much harder on yourself and on other guys if you aren’t willing to set a high standard.

Of course, the responsibility is not all on the girls. Guys need to be courageous enough to set their own standards high as well as recognize the great value of women (even if they don’t recognize it). Men, don’t wimp out on a challenge. If a girl tells you she’s waiting for marriage to have sex – don’t try to change her mind. If she tells you she’s saving her next kiss for marriage – don’t ridicule her. Any champion knows that becoming a champion takes hard work and sacrifice. Be a man and accept the challenge to greatness.

Still, it is the female that has the greatest power in the relationship. It all starts with her. Because the man generally pursues the lady – she can name her price. A man who truly loves her will be willing to do whatever it takes to earn her love. Unless she sets a high price at the beginning, neither the woman nor the man will ever know what price he was willing to pay to earn her love.

Questions for Discussion:

1) If you owned a Ferrari… would you sell it for $20? Why not?

2) Why are girls willing to lower their standards for a guy?

3) What kind of struggles do guys face when they try to set high standards in a relationship (where maybe the girl is not as interested in chastity)?

4) Why is difficult for guys to pursue girls who have high standards and strive to live chastely?

5) What are some other ways girls can set their price high?

Ever feel like you’re not sure how to share your faith with others… without sounding like a weirdo?

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Everyone is called to be a leader. Unlike authority, leadership is something that every person can exercise and is not attached to any particular rank or job title. Rather, leadership is a behavior that is common among the greatest military officers, enlisted persons, CEO’s, students, parents, religious, and persons of every profession.
What does it mean to be a leader? Here are Thirsting for Truth’s 5 points of Leadership

1) Great Leaders are first great followers

– Think about it for a second. How can you ask others to follow you if you are not willing to follow someone else’s lead?

– There is a common phrase that people say that goes, “Be a leader – not a follower”. I disagree with that philosophy. Sure, we must resist the temptation to just follow the herd out of fear of extra responsibility, sacrifice, or fear of being put on the spot to defend what is right. However, we must also resist the temptation to seek our individualism in order to avoid “being a follower”. Great leaders learn from other great leaders. Therefore, every great leader must first be a great follower.

2) Leaders Must Be Willing to Serve

– Leadership is not about barking orders, it is about bringing out the best in others. If you’re only concerned about how to get yourself ahead you will be inclined to step on others to get there. Have you ever had a manager make you feel like they were more interested in their own promotion or their own agenda ahead of your well being? Those who look out for themselves have to fend for themselves. Those who look out for others will have dozens of others looking out for them.

– Great leaders know that they are only successful if the people they lead are successful. This is the model that Jesus Christ left for us and this is the model the Church still follows today. The Pope, who is our most cherished and primary leader, is often referred to as “The Servant of the Servants of God”. If Priests are servants of the people then Bishops are the servants of the Priests and the Pope is the servant of the Bishops. In reverse, we know that the Pope is the primary leader of the Bishops who are the leaders of the Priesthood and Priests are leaders of the Church communities.

3) Leaders Build Trust

– It’s important for leaders to build and maintain relationships. Relationships are built on trust. Trust is very difficult to regain once it’s lost. Therefore, leaders must be diligent in their efforts to build and maintain trust. When people have a deep trust for a leader they are usually willing to follow them to great lengths. Trust is the one thing a leader can never afford to lose.

4) Always Do the Right Thing

– This is probably the most important aspect of leadership. You don’t have to be a great speaker or even a great conversationalist to be a leader. You don’t have to be a manager, an officer, or in any position of authority to be a leader. Leadership and authority are not the same thing. Leaders are leaders because they are willing to stand out when they have to. They lose the trust of others when they forget the golden rule of leadership: “Always Do The Right Thing. No Matter The Situation”. This is where it’s okay to not be a follower. When everyone else is doing something wrong be courageous and do what you know to be right.

5) Dream Big and Share Your Dreamspace

– Leaders are often visionaries. They are not afraid to set their sights on what may seem impossible or improbable. They often fascinate us with their unjustified confidence in some belief or idea and we might even be willing to follow them out of sheer curiosity. However, the greatest leaders learn how to make their dreams a reality by teaming up with other dreamers. When you start to ask about the dreams of the people around you you’ll start to find places where your dreams converge. Take an interest in others’ dreams and they will take an interest yours.

Remember, leadership is not authority. Everyone is called to be a leader. One day someone, maybe your future child, will look to you for guidance. What kind of leader will you be for them?

Questions for Discussion:

1) In your opinion, what makes a great leader?

2) What makes a bad leader?

3) In what areas do you feel you need to grow in order to be a greater leader?